Happy New Year

I was driving to New Year's Eve gathering hosted by a co-worker in Rutherford county. I was only a few minutes out when I saw someone waving in the road. I came across a vehicle parked oddly at an intersection. I decided to give them a wide berth - New Year's Eve...wacko drunks.

Then I saw a man lying in the road.

I put my car in the roadside and jumped out.

I keep thinking over what happened next. I got out and figured out pretty quickly what had happened. SUV. Pedestrian. It was really bad.

Usually when I get to a scene as a photojournalist things have been cleaned up a bit. Not this time. This time I was one of the first there, besides the woman who'd hit him, so for a moment there I had an active function.

Secure the scene! I've got flares. Don't need them, someone else has arrived, blocking traffic.

Vitals! He's breathing. That's good.

Injuries! Anything I know how to do would have likely as not done more harm than good in the seconds before first responders arrived. I looked back at my car, thinking of my sleeping bag to keep him warm, but by the time I can finish this sentence his daughter was there, local emergency personnel were on the scene and I was backing out of the way.

I keep reexamining my actions, evaluating my performance. I am always scared I may make the wrong decision or freeze at a decisive moment. Maybe I was in training to be an Army officer. Maybe I was a Boy Scout.

I think at one point I asked the man in the road if he needed first aid.

Stupid, obvious, but what it took to get my head in the game as I reverted back to my training, so I guess I had to fumble through it.

He later passed away.

There was never anything I could do and I'm really, really sorry.