Burning marshmallow to the forehead....

Following a small fire at Crowders Mountain that was really not very photogenic (sorry about those photos, folks), I’m poking around www.smokeybear.com.

Though it pains me to split with the great, bear-fearing Stephen Colbert on this one, I think Smokey’s a pretty good bear. The Web site has a variety of info on how some small fires are environmentally beneficial, information on outdoor safety and tips on how to prevent forest fires…

• If smoking is permitted outdoors, safe practice requires a 3-foot clearing around the smoker.
And don’t put your butt out in dried leaves. That should be really self-evident.

• Don't park your vehicle on dry grass.
Yeah, I’ve heard of that lighting fires before. Still, I wind up pulled over by the side of the road some covering events and accidents for my job, but it’s usually on short roadside grass….

• If off-road vehicle use is allowed, internal combustion equipment requires a spark arrester.
I drive a Camry. Not usually an issue.

• Know your county's outdoor burning regulations. Unlawful trash burning is a punishable offense.
Yeah, we hear these a lot on the scanner….

• At the first sign of a wildfire, leave area immediately by established trails or roads. Contact a Ranger as soon as possible. If escape route is blocked, go to the nearest lake or stream.
At the first sign of a wildfire, I’m breaking out the smores! Or maybe not.

• Leave campsite as natural as possible, traveling on trails and other durable surfaces.
Yeah, that’s the whole "leave no trace" thing…. "Take only photographs, leave only footprints."

• Inspect your site upon leaving.
Maybe you’ll find some of my old tent stakes that I screwed up and missed.

• Never take burning sticks out of a fire.
But that’s half the fun! What about burning marshmallows? I remember one trip where my friends were enjoying flinging the burning balls of sugar into the lake… when one got loose and stuck me on the forehead. In retrospect, yeah, never take burning sticks out of a fire….

• Never take any type of fireworks on public lands.
The best place for fireworks is on a pier. Or at least that’s how we do it in Eastern North Carolina.

• Keep stoves, lanterns and heaters away from combustibles.
Remember the Hindenburg?

• Store flammable liquid containers in a safe place.
They’re called "Molotov Cocktails" after a foreign minister of the Soviet Union, which the Finns used them against. Touching story, really.

• Never use stoves, lanterns and heaters inside a tent.
Because carbon monoxide isn’t half as tasty as it sounds….